Episode 87

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Published on:

21st Sep 2026

When More Training Isn’t Making You Better

Mental Toughness in Youth Sports: When to Push Through vs When to Recover (Green/Yellow/Red Signs)

Valerie Alston challenges the “do more” mindset in competitive youth sports, explaining that mental toughness includes knowing when pushing harder stops helping and recovery is needed. She distinguishes growth discomfort from depletion, emphasizing that recovery is part of training physically, mentally, and emotionally. Using a personal story of burnout from playing multiple varsity sports plus travel softball, she highlights how overloading can reduce focus and performance. The episode teaches families to recognize signs of fatigue and burnout and introduces a stoplight framework—green (push through), yellow (adjust/caution), red (stop and address)—to build self-awareness and self-regulation. Alston outlines recovery options beyond rest, including sleep, nutrition, lighter sessions, fun activities, and mental breaks, and offers discussion questions to help families evaluate what’s truly helping versus fear of falling behind.

00:00 More Isn't Always Better

01:29 Series Context And Myth

04:14 Stress Needs Recovery

06:20 Freshman Year Burnout

08:43 Tired Or Burned Out

11:18 Recovery Beyond Rest

14:15 Green Yellow Red System

18:36 Weekly Check In Plan

19:57 Family Discussion Questions

22:52 Wrap Up And Next Week

Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go.

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For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology

If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here.

Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents

Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here.

Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

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About the Podcast

Car Ride Conversations For Sports Families
Develop confident, calm and clutch youth sport athletes while you drive
The ultimate podcast for parents, coaches, and youth sport athletes who want to unlock the secrets to mental toughness, confidence, and resilience. Whether you're on your way to practice, a big game, or just tackling the daily grind, these bite-sized episodes are designed to spark meaningful conversations to equip young athletes with actionable tools to thrive in school, sports and life while building strong relationships with their parents, one car ride at a time.

Hosted by Valerie Alston, former D1 athlete, sport psychology expert, and resilience coach, each episode dives into key topics like building effective self-talk, staying calm under pressure, and bouncing back from setbacks. With real-life stories, practical tips, and relatable insights, you'll discover how to support your youth sport athlete's journey while strengthening your connection along the way.

Buckle up and join us for a ride full of inspiration, growth, and the skills needed to become Confident, Calm, and Clutch!

Questions? Comments? Ideas?
✉️ Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

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About your host

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Valerie Alston

Drawing from a rich background as a former D1 softball player and a Certified Mental Performance Consultant, she boasts over 15 years of experience dedicated to teaching and training Soldiers in the intricate art of mental toughness and resilience. As a distinguished author and coach, she brings a unique perspective to the realm of performance enhancement. Currently, her passion lies in empowering today's youth, leveraging her expertise to build and foster resilience through sports and mental toughness training, ensuring the next generation thrives in both their athletic pursuits and broader life challenges. With a comprehensive approach to athlete development, she extends her expertise to parents and coaches. Committed to enhancing understanding, she collaborates with them to impart valuable insights on building the mental toughness of young athletes, fostering an environment that nurtures resilience and unleashes their full potential.