The Secret to Loving Competition Without Letting It Define You

Compete WITH, Not Against: Ricky Scruggs on Identity, Confidence & Loving Your Opponent

Host Valerie Alston welcomes mental skills coach and former baseball player Ricky Scruggs to discuss a healthier approach to competition, identity, and team culture for young athletes and parents. Scruggs shares his path from record-setting hitter to JUCO World Series, Division I at UNLV, and independent ball, then into car sales and ultimately running a baseball academy for nearly 20 years, where he blended biomechanics with a mental skills model. He emphasizes that athletes often tie identity to results, creating pressure, and encourages separating self-worth from performance. Scruggs reframes competition as “seeking together,” aiming to bring out each other’s best, and highlights belonging, mission-focused mindset, collective responsibility, and strong teammates who challenge one another. Valerie closes with family discussion questions on competing with vs against, giving vs getting, healthy internal competition, and valuing relationships over results.

00:00 Rethinking Competition

00:54 Meet Ricky Scruggs

01:34 Ricky’s Athlete Journey

03:04 From Car Sales to Academy

04:29 Identity Beyond Results

05:47 James Bond Mission Mindset

07:48 Belonging Over Scholarships

10:20 True Meaning of Compete

12:23 Love Your Opponent

14:02 Teammates Push Teammates

17:59 Car Ride Discussion Questions

21:00 Final Takeaway and Wrap

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Discussion questions:

1. Competition with vs. against

• Ricky talked about competing with your opponent instead of against them. What do you think he meant by that? How might that change the way you approach games?

2. What are you trying to give?

• When you step onto the field or court, what do you hope to give your teammates today? Encouragement? Energy? Leadership? Effort? How is that different from focusing only on what you hope to get?

3. Strong teammates challenge each other

• Have you ever had a teammate who pushed you to become better? What did they do that helped you grow? How can healthy competition make an entire team stronger?

4. Relationships or results?

• At the end of your sports career, what do you think you'll remember more—the wins and losses, or the people you shared them with? What can we do now to make sure we're building both great memories and great relationships?

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