Episode 77

full
Published on:

13th Jul 2026

How to Stay Composed When the Game Gets Chaotic

Overwhelmed in the Game? Simplify: 3 Ways to Reduce Mental Load and Play Your Best

Host Valerie Alston explains how chaos in sports can overwhelm athletes by maxing out limited cognitive capacity, leading to slower processing, hesitation, rushed decisions, missed cues, and errors. Instead of trying to think more, she teaches listeners to simplify by focusing on “What’s important now?” and “What is my job for the next five seconds?” She shares three practical tools to reduce mental load: narrowing to a single controllable cue (“the win”), grounding in the present with “feet and breath” or a physical anchor, and using a practiced reset routine—release, refocus, respond. She also advises parents and coaches to avoid adding to athletes’ cognitive load with too many instructions, especially for younger kids, and offers a weekly challenge to build a personalized chaos-to-composure plan plus family discussion questions.

00:00 Simplify the Chaos

00:41 Meet the Host

01:54 Why Overwhelm Happens

04:23 Cognitive Overload Signs

06:09 Whats Important Now

08:45 Grounding in the Moment

12:22 Reset Routine Steps

15:48 Parents and Coaches Cues

18:31 Weekly Challenge Plan

19:49 Car Ride Questions

23:03 Wrap Up and Next Steps

Discussion questions:

  1. What does it feel like in your body or mind when a game starts becoming too chaotic?
  2. What is one situation in your sport where you tend to think about too many things at once?
  3. When that situation happens, what could your ‘What’s Important Now?’ answer be?”
  4. What role do your parents play in adding to the chaos? Are there things they do during games that add to the chaos?

Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go.

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For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology

If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here.

Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents

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Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

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About the Podcast

Car Ride Conversations For Sports Families
Develop confident, calm and clutch youth sport athletes while you drive
The ultimate podcast for parents, coaches, and youth sport athletes who want to unlock the secrets to mental toughness, confidence, and resilience. Whether you're on your way to practice, a big game, or just tackling the daily grind, these bite-sized episodes are designed to spark meaningful conversations to equip young athletes with actionable tools to thrive in school, sports and life while building strong relationships with their parents, one car ride at a time.

Hosted by Valerie Alston, former D1 athlete, sport psychology expert, and resilience coach, each episode dives into key topics like building effective self-talk, staying calm under pressure, and bouncing back from setbacks. With real-life stories, practical tips, and relatable insights, you'll discover how to support your youth sport athlete's journey while strengthening your connection along the way.

Buckle up and join us for a ride full of inspiration, growth, and the skills needed to become Confident, Calm, and Clutch!

Questions? Comments? Ideas?
✉️ Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

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About your host

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Valerie Alston

Drawing from a rich background as a former D1 softball player and a Certified Mental Performance Consultant, she boasts over 15 years of experience dedicated to teaching and training Soldiers in the intricate art of mental toughness and resilience. As a distinguished author and coach, she brings a unique perspective to the realm of performance enhancement. Currently, her passion lies in empowering today's youth, leveraging her expertise to build and foster resilience through sports and mental toughness training, ensuring the next generation thrives in both their athletic pursuits and broader life challenges. With a comprehensive approach to athlete development, she extends her expertise to parents and coaches. Committed to enhancing understanding, she collaborates with them to impart valuable insights on building the mental toughness of young athletes, fostering an environment that nurtures resilience and unleashes their full potential.