Episode 57

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Published on:

23rd Feb 2026

Joy vs. Pressure: What Olympic Free Skates Teach Us About Mindset

Pressure vs Joy at the 2026 Winter Olympics: Mindset Lessons from Ilia Malinin & Alysa Liu

In this episode of Car Ride Conversations for Sports Families, host Valerie Alston uses two contrasting 2026 Winter Olympics free skate finals to explore how mindset shapes performance and the experience of competing. She discusses Ilia Malinin entering as the heavy favorite, describing overwhelming attention, internal nerves, and pressure that contributed to a poor free skate and a drop to eighth place. In contrast, Alysa Liu returned after retiring for two years due to burnout, spending time in college classes, hiking, skiing, and reconnecting with life outside skating; she came back skating for joy and artistic expression, choosing her music, choreography, and costume design, and delivering a gold medal performance with what commentators called “California Calm.” Valerie explains the difference between performing for external approval and outcomes versus performing for love of the game, and how tying identity and self-worth to results can create anxiety and overthinking that disrupts automatic skills. She encourages athletes and parents to build a healthier performance mindset by developing interests and relationships outside sport, remembering that results don’t define personal worth, and intentionally reconnecting to joy when nerves rise. The episode ends with guided car-ride discussion questions about pressure versus enjoyment, grounding activities outside sport, reconnecting to why you love your sport, and finding joy and resilience even when results don’t go as planned, including Valerie’s example of a favorite softball game that her team lost in 18 innings against Northwestern.

Discussion questions:

  1. Pressure vs. Enjoyment: How do you feel when you think about performing for others vs. performing for yourself and your joy in the sport?
  2. Perspective Check: What activities or relationships outside your sport help you feel grounded and less defined by scores or results?
  3. Internal Meaning: How can you remind yourself why you love your sport the next time nerves show up?
  4. Resilience in Response: When something doesn’t go as planned, how can you reconnect with joy instead of dwelling on pressure?


Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go.

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For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology

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About the Podcast

Car Ride Conversations For Sports Families
Develop confident, calm and clutch youth sport athletes while you drive
The ultimate podcast for parents, coaches, and youth sport athletes who want to unlock the secrets to mental toughness, confidence, and resilience. Whether you're on your way to practice, a big game, or just tackling the daily grind, these bite-sized episodes are designed to spark meaningful conversations to equip young athletes with actionable tools to thrive in school, sports and life while building strong relationships with their parents, one car ride at a time.

Hosted by Valerie Alston, former D1 athlete, sport psychology expert, and resilience coach, each episode dives into key topics like building effective self-talk, staying calm under pressure, and bouncing back from setbacks. With real-life stories, practical tips, and relatable insights, you'll discover how to support your youth sport athlete's journey while strengthening your connection along the way.

Buckle up and join us for a ride full of inspiration, growth, and the skills needed to become Confident, Calm, and Clutch!

Questions? Comments? Ideas?
✉️ Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

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About your host

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Valerie Alston

Drawing from a rich background as a former D1 softball player and a Certified Mental Performance Consultant, she boasts over 15 years of experience dedicated to teaching and training Soldiers in the intricate art of mental toughness and resilience. As a distinguished author and coach, she brings a unique perspective to the realm of performance enhancement. Currently, her passion lies in empowering today's youth, leveraging her expertise to build and foster resilience through sports and mental toughness training, ensuring the next generation thrives in both their athletic pursuits and broader life challenges. With a comprehensive approach to athlete development, she extends her expertise to parents and coaches. Committed to enhancing understanding, she collaborates with them to impart valuable insights on building the mental toughness of young athletes, fostering an environment that nurtures resilience and unleashes their full potential.