Making Friends with Failure

How to Turn Failure into Success: The Growth Mindset for Athletes

Failure isn't the enemy; it's the best teammate you can have. In this episode of Car Ride Conversations for Sports Families, host Valerie Alston discusses the importance of embracing failure as part of the growth process for athletes. Valerie explains how a growth mindset, where athletes view their abilities as improvable with effort and practice, can transform failures into learning opportunities. She contrasts this with a fixed mindset, where abilities are viewed as static, and emphasizes the importance of redefining success beyond just wins and stats. The episode also provides practical tips for fostering a growth mindset, setting tangible goals, and redefining success. Conversation prompts are provided to encourage meaningful dialogue between parents and young athletes about mental toughness, resilience, and confidence.

00:00 Introduction: Embracing Failure

01:11 Understanding Failure in Sports

02:52 Building a Growth Mindset

09:08 Redefining Success Beyond Wins

15:20 Conversation Prompts for Families

19:52 Conclusion and Call to Action

Discussion questions:

1. “What’s a recent mistake or failure that actually taught you something useful?”
2. “If success wasn’t about winning today, how else could you define it?”
3. “How do elite athletes you admire talk about failure — and what does that teach you about how they improved?”
4. “How do my (parent or coach) reactions — my words, tone, or body language — after your tough moments affect the way you feel about failure?”

Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go.

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For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology

If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here.

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Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

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