Episode 32

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Published on:

18th Aug 2025

The “What If” Trap: How to Stay in the Moment and Play Your Best

Shut Down the 'What If' Trap: Boosting Athlete Confidence and Focus

Welcome back to Confident Calm Clutch Car Ride Conversations with your host Valerie Alston! In this episode, we tackle the common pre-game mental trap of 'What if?' thoughts that cause anxiety and hinder performance. Learn how elite athletes manage these thoughts to stay focused and present in the moment. Discover two key strategies: mindfulness for grounding yourself in the present and 'If-Then' planning for productive game prep. Perfect for athletes and parents alike, this episode offers practical tools to build mental toughness and resilience. Join us and turn every car ride into an opportunity for meaningful dialogue and lifelong skills development!


00:00 Introduction: Overcoming the 'What If' Trap

00:17 Welcome to Confident Calm Clutch Car Ride Conversations

00:54 Understanding the 'What If' Thoughts

01:51 The Mind-Body Connection and Anxiety

04:27 Grounding Techniques to Stay Present

07:38 Productive 'What If' Thoughts and Strategy

10:59 Interactive Discussion Questions

12:53 Conclusion and Final Thoughts



Discussion questions:

  1. When you get nervous, what’s one thought that tends to pop up first?
  2. What’s something I can say to myself instead that would help me focus?
  3. How can we help each other focus more on what we can control, not what might go wrong?





Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go.

For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter 

For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology

Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents

Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here.

Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

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Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666

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About the Podcast

Car Ride Conversations For Sports Families
Conversation prompts for building mentally tough young athletes while you drive
The ultimate podcast for parents, coaches, and young athletes who want to unlock the secrets to mental toughness, confidence, and resilience. Whether you're on your way to practice, a big game, or just tackling the daily grind, these bite-sized episodes are designed to spark meaningful conversations to equip young athletes with actionable tools to thrive in school, sports and life while building strong relationships with their parents, one car ride at a time.

Hosted by Valerie Alston, former D1 athlete, sport psychology expert, and resilience coach, each episode dives into key topics like building effective self-talk, staying calm under pressure, and bouncing back from setbacks. With real-life stories, practical tips, and relatable insights, you'll discover how to support your athlete's journey while strengthening your connection along the way.

Buckle up and join us for a ride full of inspiration, growth, and the skills needed to become Confident, Calm, and Clutch!

Questions? Comments? Ideas?
✉️ Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com

Follow Me On:
📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching
▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666

✨ For exclusive tips, tools, and updates, join my newsletter:
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About your host

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Valerie Alston

Drawing from a rich background as a former D1 softball player and a Certified Mental Performance Consultant, she boasts over 15 years of experience dedicated to teaching and training Soldiers in the intricate art of mental toughness and resilience. As a distinguished author and coach, she brings a unique perspective to the realm of performance enhancement. Currently, her passion lies in empowering today's youth, leveraging her expertise to build and foster resilience through sports and mental toughness training, ensuring the next generation thrives in both their athletic pursuits and broader life challenges. With a comprehensive approach to athlete development, she extends her expertise to parents and coaches. Committed to enhancing understanding, she collaborates with them to impart valuable insights on building the mental toughness of young athletes, fostering an environment that nurtures resilience and unleashes their full potential.